


If You Do

by lazyeggs



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Betrayal, Bonding, Cheating, Childhood Friends, Denial of Feelings, Distrust, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friends to Enemies, M/M, Past Park Jinyoung/Choi Youngjae, Pining, Post-Break Up, Regret, fuckboy! jaebeom, is my kink, jinyoungs also kinda tsundere at first lmao
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-07-18 12:43:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16118711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazyeggs/pseuds/lazyeggs
Summary: Having recently been broken up with by his boyfriend of two years, heartbroken Park Jinyoung develops feelings for his best friend’s boyfriend and soon, he has to choose between the two, eventually experiencing a different type of heartache.Previously titled ‘Heartache’





	1. broken

Frozen in his place barely two feet away from the other man, Jinyoung's eyesight blurs. 

"What?" He stammers. He heard Youngjae, but hes shocked, so  _so_ shocked and heartbroken; he prays that his boyfriend will apologize and say it was a prank. He prays that he simply misheard the other, but deep down, he knows he heard him correctly, and his stomach feels as if it's trying to escape through his throat. 

"Hyung..." Youngjae says, voice cracking as if  _he_ was the one being dumped. He stands up, slips his coat over his shoulders and pulls Jinyoung into the tightest, coldest embrace he's ever felt. Jinyoung wants to be mad, he wants to hate Youngjae, but he can't bring himself to. He's hurting just as much as him. "I'm sorry." And with that, he's gone. He turns around, walks away, walks straight out the door without hesitation, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his coat. His presence is merely a ghost, now, and Jinyoung is left with his face in his hands, ugly sobs pouring out of him. Other customers coming in and out of the café give him pitiful expressions, but he doesn't care anymore. His only love, his sunshine, is gone.

How could he care about anything anymore?

Somehow, he manages to fish his phone out of the pocket of his jacket. He fumbles with the touch ID before it finally unlocks. He's thankful that Mark is on speed-dial. He taps the contact, and the screen lights up immediately. Jinyoung presses it to his ear. It rings three times before the older picks up.

"Jinyoungie?" He sounds concerned.

"Hyung..." he hiccups. "Can you pick me up...? Youngjae and I broke up." He breaks down again, uncontrollable sobs likely blaring through the speakers of Mark's phone. He hears muffled voices from the other side of the call before the older replies.

"I'm on my way -  _yes, we have to. Be nice._ \- Where are you? -  _oh my god. Babe. Shut up._ " He hears a dramatic whine from the other side.

"That coffee shop in Jongno-gu," he pauses, tries to steady his breathing. "Namusairo." Mark informs him that they'll arrive soon, and he hangs up. Jinyoung slips his phone back into his pocket, and leans back in his chair, attempts to fix his hair by running his fingers through it.

The car ride with Mark and his boyfriend is incredibly awkward at first. Mark's quiet, nothing out of the usual, and so is Jinyoung himself, busy scowling out the window and listening to the sound of the tires splash puddles onto the sidewalks as the older drives. Jinyoung is resting his head on the glass, tracing raindrops with his finger. The coldness of the window feels nice against his skin. His mind is lingering on Youngjae.  _Youngjae, Youngjae, Youngjae._

The expression on the younger's face when he had sat down with Jinyoung was enough to make him panic, question everything. The expression on the younger's face when he whispered about wanting to break up, the same heartbroken, confused look that casted upon Jinyoung's. Youngjae wasn't his anymore. After two years, he has to call him his ex. He can nearly still feel the tingle of his lips against his own just days before, the flutter of his heart whenever he was fortunate enough to make the younger laugh, the scent of his cologne left on Jinyoung's sheets after several nights together. 

Jinyoung is broken. He was broken before, definitely, but Youngjae had been brave enough two winters enough to decide he would help glue back the pieces. Before both of them knew it, they realized he had used the wrong glue, and Youngjae had shattered both of their hearts again.

"Jinyoung-ah?" He hears a soft voice say. He averts his gaze towards the source, and Mark's boyfriend is leaning over the back of his seat, eyes round with worry and lips pouty. "Mark-yah told me what happened," He pauses. Jinyoung scoffs. Of course Mark did. Too in love with his boyfriend to respect his best friend.  _Jinyoung would never do that to him._ He had never done so throughout the two years he was in a relationship with Youngjae. "I'm sorry." Mark's boyfriend says, voice quieter and softer, hinted with something Jinyoung cant identify. Empathy, maybe. Jinyoung exhales sharply, turns back to the window.

"Just take me home, Mark." He says, just as another tear finds its way out of the corner of his eye. 

That night, as Jinyoung lays in his bed, sheets still drenched in the captivating scent of his ex boyfriend, he can't sleep. He clutches the pillow, inhaling the scent, tears soaking the fabric. He cries. He cries until he can't open his eyes, cries until his body physically can't take it anymore. He cries himself into exhaustion. 

He wakes up the next morning, smiling as he can smell his boyfriend pressed against his chest. He opens his eyes, and realizes that his boyfriend isn't his boyfriend anymore, and that he isn't pressed against his chest, but the pillow that he once used, is instead. Jinyoung cries harder. 


	2. empty

“Come on, Nyoung! Don’t just sit in here and jerk off all day, you haven’t gone outside in a week!” Jackson complains, tugging at the youngers arm as he holds onto the edge of his mattress for dear life, the Chinese-native digging his heels into the carpet. 

“ _No,_ you punk! Fuck.  _Off!”_ Jinyoung screeches the last couple of words while he pulls back the arm being nearly ripped out of its socket particularly harshly, Jackson screaming as he falls backwards and lands on his ass. “I haven’t gone out in three days, actually. Thats less than half a week,” He huffs, dusting off his arm as if trying to flick a bug away. It’s Jackson’s  _cooties_ , so same thing. 

“I don’t care, you still need air. It’s unhealthy to be all depressed in here for multiple days at a time. Besides, it’s starting to smell like high school in here,” Jackson rolls his eyes and stands up, sticking his tongue out at the younger who snorts and makes an uglier face in response. He starts to rummage through Jinyoung’s closet, the latter not finding it in him to complain. If Jackson stumbles upon another collar and leash and nearly pisses himself from laughing too hard, that’s his own damn fault. 

The older tosses a few articles of clothing to Jinyoung, smacking him right in the face and Jackson stands in front of the closet, looking smug with a hand on his hip when the Korean peels off the pair of jeans draping over his head and glares at him. 

“Let’s go see Mark-hyung,” Jackson decides, more of a demand than a suggestion. Jinyoung lifts his own shirt over his head, changing into the outfit the shorter man had picked out for him. The older doesn’t bother looking away, and Jinyoung never complains about it. As annoying as Jackson is, him and Jinyoung grew up together. They had seen eachother butt-naked far too many times, taken too many baths together as toddlers that their mothers had taken pictures of and always plastered across FaceBook just for the sake of being embarrassing. When Jackson came out to his mom as gay, she blinked a few times and asked if he was dating Jinyoung. They were closer than either of them would ever admit, unless they were drunk off their asses. 

“You look hot,” Jackson grins, wiggling an eyebrow and he smacks Jinyoung’s skinny-jean covered bottom, sweater tucked into the waist. The younger smacks him away, and goes to rummage hrough his closet for a pair of socks. He grab the first two he sees, and they dont match, but why should Jinyoung give a fuck? He slips them on his feet, one striped red/black sock and one bright pink sock with blue kitten faces printed all over it. 

“Lets go.” Jinyoung declares, dread obvious in his voice. 

“Lets.” Jackson grins. 


	3. coping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jaebeoms kinda a fuckboy at first and a bit of an asshole but it gets better,,,,, heh  
> enjoy this update!! let me know wht u think in the comments. kudos are very much appreciated <3  
> -jackson uwu

Mark startles, squeaks at the sound of his phone suddenly buzzing on the glass coffee table, rattling against the hard surface and creating a god awful sound. He shifts in his boyfriend's lap, ignoring Jaebeom's childish groan of complaint, and checks the caller ID before answering the call. Jackson would probably beat his ass if he didn't.

"You're here?" Mark repeats the Chinese-native's words, and Jaebeom looks at him with a look of confusion, tilts his head sideways. "Really? You really had to-" he sighs heavily, "okay. I'll be right down," he grumbles and pulls his phone away from his ear before ending the call and nearly throwing it back onto the table which causes Jaebeom to jump. Mark pouts and kisses his boyfriend's nose and the latter whines and grabs at his waist when he tries to get up. The older simply ignores his pleads and pries his hands off of him and hops off of his lap. "Jackson is here,"

"Without warning? Lame," Jaebeom half jokes and sits up.

"Yes, without warning." Mark repeats, rolling his eyes without an actual hint of annoyance. "He's with Jinyoung, too, apparently. You remember him, yeah? We picked him up a few days ago from the cafe," He states while he slips his shoes on. Jaebeom hums. "I'll be right back, babe." Mark says and grins when his boyfriend hurries to him and pecks his lips.

 

 

”Hyung!” Jinyoung whines when Mark instantly pulls him into a bone-crushing embrace. 

“Nyoung-ah, I haven’t seen you since the - you know,” Mark finally lets Jinyoung wiggle out of his arms. “I was worried you died or something. And you look so much more thin! Come on, Beommie and I are making you eat. You too, Seun-ah.” Mark exclaims in a panicked frenzy and grabs Jinyoung’s wrist, pulling him into the building, Jackson following close behind the two. 

“Who’s Beommie?” Jackson questions, nearly sprinting to catch up to the two others. They’re both taller than him, and seem to forget that his little legs cannot function as quickly as their own. Jinyoung thinks it’s cute, though. It reminds him of a corgi - ‘Wang puppy’ taken to a whole new level.

“My boyfriend, stupid,” Mark teases with an eye roll as the three of them enter the elevator, “almost got some good dicking down until you two fuckers decided to intrude. And by you two fuckers, I mean Jackson and Jackson only.” 

Jinyoung sticks out his tongue at the Hong-Kong native, the latter pouting and placing his hands on his hips. 

“Yah! Why am I not anyone’s favorite? Nyoungie, what happened to Wang-gae, Park-gae?” Jackson gasps in betrayal and wipes away an invisible tear. 

“Because you’re annoying.” Jinyoung replies, just as the elevator dings and the doors open, signaling that they had reached Mark’s floor. 

 

“Yah, Jaebeom-ah!” Mark calls out as soon as he swings open his door, hanging his keys on the hook by the shoerack instead of just lazily tossing them into the kitchen junk drawer. Jackson shrugs off his jacket and slips his sneakers off, flicking the back of Mark’s neck as he walks past him which makes the latter whip around and smack the Chinese right in the head. A loud laugh echoes through  the small apartment, and Jinyoung furrows his brows. He pauses as he makes eye contact with another Korean, Jinyoung’s jacket dangling off of one arm, mid-shrug. They make eye contact, and Jinyoung feels his heart begin to race for some reason. Not his fault that his best friend’s boyfriend is so fucking beautiful. “Beommie,” Mark giggles while he waddles towards the couch and plops himself right in Jaebeom’s lap, Jinyoung blinking himself out of his daze and fully shrugs off his jacket, shoes long since discarded. 

Jinyoung copies Jackson, finding himself a spare seat on the couch, awkwardly squished between the Chinese man and the two boyfriends. 

Mark’s boyfriend being so close to Jinyoung, shoulders touching, makes him forget how to think and forget how to breathe. He doesn’t even know this guy, why does he make him forget how to function? 


	4. memories

_“Your ears look stupid.” The taller boy blinked at him, shoving another graham cracker into his mouth. “They’re too big. Like Dumbo. Except you can’t fly like him, so you aren’t cool like Dumbo. You’re just ugly.” He said, half-chewed cracker almost falling out of his mouth and onto the carpet they were sat down on._

_“No, **you’re** ugly. Your bucket hat is stupid.” Jinyoung replied almost instantly, sitting on his knees and adding blocks to his lego tower. Suddenly, the blocks were all falling to the floor and then, Jinyoung suddenly was too, his hand throbbing. _

_“You’re stupid! Take it back! I don’t like you!” The other boy screeched, the other graham cracker he was once holding now discarded on the carpet and split into multiple pieces. Jinyoung looked up at the boy, blinking a few times before he started to wail, fat tears and snot dripping down his face as he hiccuped._

_“Y-you’re - you’re mean!” Jinyoung cried, rubbing at his injured hand as his face contorted with sobs._

_“Im Jaebeom!” Their teacher yelled, voice full of rage, and Jinyoung looked up, the woman standing right next to Jaebeom and staring at him with her hands on her hips. “Why in the world would you do that? Would you like it if you were playing with Lego’s and Jinyoung-ah came and kicked at you? No?”_

_Jaebeom was looking down at his feet now, hands clasped shyly behind his back. He mumbled a no, cheeks puffing out in embarrassment._

_”Apologize. Now. And clean up this mess, Jaebeom.” She demanded, and walked away, probably to get the hand-held vacuum to clean up the crushed graham cracker from the carpet._

_Jinyoung stayed sat on the ground, wiping at his puffy eyes with his sleeve and sniffling back further tears. Jaebeom had sat himself right in front of the younger and stared at him in almost awe for a few minutes before standing up and walking away. The younger watched as Jaebeom shyly asked something at their teacher’s feet and watched as he waddled over to Jinyoung with a grin on his face and a small hand holding another graham cracker, snapped into two different pieces._

_“Here you go!” Jaebeom squeaked, sitting down in front of Jinyoung and handed him one of the cracker halves. The latter gladly accepted it without much thought. Jinyoung was only in pre-k, he had even less of a concept of grudges and accepting food from kids you don’t really know._

_The older’s smile only brightened when Jinyoung started munching on the graham cracker, chubby cheeks puffing out as he chewed._

_“Let’s be best friends.” Jaebeom declared as he grabbed the Lego blocks he had previously knocked down and started to rebuild Jinyoung’s tower._

_“Okay.” Jinyoung agreed._


	5. realizing

“... Jirongie?” Mark’s boyfriend suddenly says, voice hinted with hesitance. Jinyoung’s eyes widen as he meets the gaze of Jaebeom. He realizes it, recognizes the smooth yet roughness of his voice, the twin moles underneath his eye. 

“Jaebeom-ah?” Jinyoung blinks. Mark and Jackson stare at the two as if it was the strangest moment they have ever witnessed. After a few awkward seconds, the oldest of the four clears his throat before speaking, his voice containing some emotion that Jinyoung can’t recognize. 

“‘Nyoungie, how do you know my boyfriend?” He asks, seemingly cuddling himself further against Jaebeom’s torso. Jinyoung opens his mouth to reply, but before he gets a chance to say anything, Mark’s boyfriend speaks up. 

“We were friends in elementary school.” Jaebeom explains. “I moved when I was nine, though, so we didn’t really see eachother after that...” he trails off. Mark nods slowly, the room once again filling with awkward silence. “Why does he get to call you Jaebeom-ah when he’s younger than us?” He says, at the same time that Jackson speaks,

”Jaebeom-ah. Can I call you that too?” 

The mentioned man says nothing in reply, instead opting to throw one of the small pillows at Jackson, who screams and clings himself to Jinyoung. Jinyoung snorts and pushes the older off of him, which causes him to completely fall off of the couch and hit the wooden floorboards. Both Mark and Jinyoung burst into laughter, and the latter quickly draws his sweater paw up to his mouth to cover it out of habit. 

“‘Nyoung-ah, you even still laugh the same! The hand thing and all,” Jaebeom grins, mindlessly playing with his older boyfriend’s fingers. 

“You still look the same as you did the day before you left,” Jinyoung replies, “except this time, instead of an ugly ass bucket hat, you’ve opted for a disastrous mullet.” He adds, pretending to gag. Jaebeom kicks his thigh, pouting. 

“Yah! My mullet is sexy, excuse you!” 

 


End file.
